Weight... take a new look!

Something to add to my talk about weight.


Certain fruits can help keep your weight down

For this talk I will be joined by nutritionist and life coach Bonny Prim

We will be looking at:

• The diet industry and why it doesn't work in the long term.
• How the language we use like 'I want to lose weight' can set us up for failure.
• What you might want to do instead

Go home with 8 tips to keep you well.

Booking is essential 

IF FULLY BOOKED, LET ME HAVE YOUR CONTACT DETAILS AND I WILL PUT YOU ON THE LIST FOR THE NEXT ONE IN JUNE/JULY TIME.

Language tip to remember things and get what you want!

Of course this is what many people say. This is because the brain does not recognise a negative. In the same way you can't not think of a pink elephant, you can't not forget. You can think of a blue one instead but this is not the same as not thinking of a pink one. 

If you want to 'not forget' you need to tell your brain what you actually want it it do which is to remember and be specific about when you want to remember. 

When we do remember it is important that we acknowledge our brain for what it has accomplished i.e. what we have asked it to do and remembered something. 

However most of the time we beat it up about it and say, Oh I forgot..... actually no, you have just remembered! If you keep telling a child off, every time it does what you asked it to do (just not at the time you want, because you did not specify a time) then it will give up even remembering so that it doesn't get told off.   Tell yourself I need to remember to do/get such and such before I go to or before and give a specific time. 

So remember, be kind to yourself all the time, there are plenty of people out there ready to put you down, you don't need to do it to yourself.

Powerful questions to help you get clarity

Just saw a quote by Einstein which said: 'the important thing is not to stop questioning'

It is important though to ask the right kind of questions though!
Open ones rather than closed ones- i.e: ones that don't just have a yes or no answer.
Also I usually say don't ask questions starting with why, because we often don't know why (especially children) and even knowing why may not solve the issue.

I have noticed that when I am asked: 'why did you ....',  I immediately feel attacked, it feels like I have done something wrong and I need to justify my actions.  Being asked why I left the drawer open again, will just make me respond because I hadn't finished and was going to put the thing back I got out of there. This does not help the person who asked the question feel any better about it, nor does it help me change the behaviour that is obviously irritating the other person. By this time we are both defending our own position and an argument may arise.

If the person asked themselves what is it about the drawer being left open that irritates me, then they might find out they feel it is dangerous. Then they could say they would feel safer and more comfortable if I shut the drawer even if I am coming back later. This then doesn't sound like an attack and I am much more likely to respond favourably to the request.

Questions beginning with where, when, how, what will give you a much better idea of what is going on in the other person.
For example:
how does.. affect... what you do
how often does this occur,
when does such and such. occur,
what makes .....happen.

Here are some questions I ask clients that might help you understand more about what is affecting the way you feel.

When does it happen?
When is it worse?
When is it better?
How long have you felt this?
When did you first experience this?
What is it you would like instead?
Where were you when you first felt that way?
What helped you then?
Can you use that now?
If not then what else could help you?
What might stop you from doing that?
How can you overcome that?

Well I hope that just going through these questions has already helped you and if you want more then let me know, you don't have to struggle on your own, face to face or skype sessions are available, .

The secrets of language!

Watch the video for a different take on the use of language.
I help client re-phrase their desired outcomes or goals from sessions as they often don't know how to phrase what they really want. They can tell me what they don't want and this makes it difficult for them to achieve their real desired goal. Language is very powerful so watch what you say and what it really means.  For example, I don't think of what I do as work but as play, in the way that a child learns through play and exploration. This is because work implies effort and this is the opposite of what I want to achieve in the muscles when I want them to relax, I want softness, ease and freedom.
When you understand how the everyday language you use can keep you trapped in a life you don't fully want and begin to re-phrase things, it is much easier to change it.  It does take awareness discipline though to stop saying things like "I want a break" and say "I want a rest" instead.

Enjoy observing yourself and let me know what phrases or words you used and how you have changed them. If you don't know how to change them let me know in the comment box below and I will see if I can come up with something for you. Have fun!